mind your language - the school fete




Genre
comedy

Producer by
Stuart Allen / Albert Moses / Bachu Patel


Directed by
Stuart Allen

Writer by
Vince Powell

Created by
Vince Powell


Cast
Barry Evans / George Camiller / Jacki Harding / Zara Nutley / Ricardo Montez / Albert Moses / Robert Lee / Kevork Malikyan / Jamila Massey / Françoise Pascal / Dino Shafeek / Pik Sen Lim / Anna Bergman / Tommy Godfrey / Iris Sadler / Harry Littlewood / Sue Bond / Marie-Elise Grepne / Jenny Lee Wright / Raj Patel / Vincent Wong / Gabor Vernon / Deirdre Costello / Fraser Kerr / Gail Playfair / John M. East / Louise Burton / Blake Butler / George A. Cooper / Claire Davenport / Robert Dorning / Jeannette Charles / Noel Coleman / David King / Shaun Curry / Lucy Griffiths / Anthony Jackson / Dickie Davies / Russell Hunter / Barbara Keogh / Ahmed Khalil / Joan Heath / Terry Duggan

Production company
 London Weekend Television (LWT), Tri Films

Original channel
ITV

Original language
English


Country of origin
United kingdom

Broadcast dates
30 December 1977 (UK)

Original runing time
30 December 1977 – 12 April 1986

Episode duration
30 min (29 episodes)

Picture format
4:3

Guest stars
Ray Marioni / Russell Harty / Damaris Hayman / Arthur Mullard / Patrick O'Connell / Michael Sheard / Gyearbuor Asante / Charu Bala Chokshi / David Moran / Margaret Courtenay / Arnold Peters / Dorothea Phillips / Elizabeth Adare / Sonny Caldinez / John Quayle / John Lyons / Derek Ware


 episode summary
The school hosts a charity bazaar and needs a celebrity to be the Master of Ceremonies. Max claims to be best friends with a popular British comedian, but eventually confesses to the class that he's never really met him. When TV newsreader Robert Dougall is unable to open the summer fete, Max tells everyone that he is friendly with comedy actor Arthur Mullard and that he will ask him to open the fete instead. The problem is that Max doesn't really know him so he asks Sid to phone up as Arthur and cancel.

Quotes :
Juan Cervantes: For £5, you get a kiss on one cheek.
[He kisses Danielle as said]
Juan Cervantes: For £10, you get a kiss on both cheeks.
[He kisses Danielle as said]
Juan Cervantes: And for £15...
[He nearly swallows Danielle's mouth in a breath-taking manoeuvre]
Giovanni Cupello: I buy one of them £15 kisses!
Juan Cervantes: I no kiss you!
Giovanni Cupello: Not you, Danielle, you silly Spanish omelette!

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